learning to wait...

... is a continual process for me. During a marriage that was 20 painful years too long I focused on loving my kids and waiting and wishing for a better life, (TO BE LOVED) never giving up hope that somehow it could be. Now, more than eight years into a new life with so much growth and the time and ability to work on me (for the first time in my life) I have reached a new place... out on a ledge surveying a view. The view behind me is clear with some amazing twists and turns that could only have been guided by some sweet grace, and the view ahead is somewhat obscured and only waiting will show me where to go.

What will happen next is in hands other than mine... not something I have ever relished... but I have now lived long enough to know that control is an illusion and the best we can do is make the most of the circumstances that present themselves and work with what we are given.

Over time I have learned lessons in so many ways, but recently seeing how people around me handle challenges, some with grace and strength - some selfishly only looking out for themselves - and some quitting in the face of obstacles, reminds me that every moment of every day is an opportunity to live and BE BETTER than the day before. To grow into new understandings, to reach out for new opportunities, and to accept that maybe the universe has new, different, or bigger plans than you ever imagined. Nothing - ever - stays - the - same....... doesn't always have to be a bad thing.

I put a stick in the fire last night for the full moon and the short version of the intention that went with the stick is about embracing change...... the highest good for all (because I cannot pretend to know what is best).... and positive outcomes (whatever that might mean.) In recent days I have frequently wished for a crystal ball, but knowing what is around the next corner wouldn't change it and maybe just maybe it really is just all about the journey.